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Monday, May 23, 2011

Dead and Deader 2006

Greetings! todays Treat is called "Dead and Deader". This was awarded 3 3/4 stars on Netflix and 4.9 on IMDB. You can view the trailer(s) HERE.

This gem starts out with a group of commandos getting ready to attack a secret hideout somewhere in Cambodia. Our main character gets stung by what I can only call a super scorpion. interesting how cambodia looks alot like the woods of North Carolina. They find a couple of corpses. some chewed on and some burnt. thats when all hell breaks loose and the team is attacked by undead. A random scientist decides he's not going to become one of "them" so he tosses a grenade into the middle of the room. Basically he blows the place to shit, killing all of the soldiers. (or did he?)

Dean Cain stars in this award winning piece. You know him, played super man in "Lois and Clark: The Adventures of Superman". Anywho, the bodies are evacuated out, and as they start to autopsy the body, he stops him right before he gets to gut him like a trout. he is then told he was sent in, in a body bag

The Dr. discovers that Lt Quinn has no vital signs. Somehoe one of the scorpions embedded itself in Lt quinn's arm, which he proceeds to cut out. the wound heals spontaneously. The Dr. in charge places Lt Quinn in isolation. Obviously Lt Quinn has some ESP along with his new found strength and "senses" that another corpse was wondering around.

The other corpse tries to make a meal outta the cook. instead he gets an armfull outta the female Dr. who quickly turns into one of them. It's a shame . She was hot. She in turns takes a few fingers from the other Dr. The female Dr gets the top of her head removed by a very slow moving fan.  ODD the other corpse (cruz gets his hand placed in a meat tenderizer and pulls out a black bloody stump. An interesting addition to this movie is that all who get infected seem to obtain black blood instantly.

The chef and Lt Quinn exchange some chit chat about being dead. When Lt. Quinn gets a craving for red meat and the two are arrested. Quinn is now in the office of some bigwig who doesnt beleive a word he says. In fact, and I quote, " your story has more holes than a Michael Bay Film". Now what is he trying to say here? Michael Bay sucks? Or that he has a lot of gash in his flicks? >:).

Lt Quinn insists on being moved to the CDC but that isn't an option. He is arrested and awaiting his court martial. the chef and Quinn make a run for it in a jeep. the jeep happens to breakdown. CONVENIENT. Leaving the chef who is still unidentified as of yet and Lt Quinn to hoof it as they try to track the other two corpses.

Oh what a surprise, the other two members of the squad awaken in zombified states as they are being hauled to their towns of origin and make a nice healthy meal of the two soldiers carrying them. Finally our two heros find the corpse carrying vehicle and guess what. The only thing to be found is an empty body bag. Now is tracking three ghouls and wind up in a really high class establishment. Well it seems that they are now on the tv as wanted.

Ironically, the three ghouls have stumbled upon the same dive bar as Lt Quinn. They reak havoc in the bar gathering more undead to the group. The sexy bartender, Lt quinn and the chef clean house.
The cops show up and arrest the two. only to have them escape by way of cop car and hot bartender. They try to find some place to hold up and get some clean clothes. Finally we find out the cooks name, Louis.

Thry track down the remaining corpse waiting to be buried. find out where the wake is and break into the Anderson's home.  Lt Quinn, starts to get a craving and the munchies, finds some steak and try to get to the body. They pick up another member of the group by the name of Helen. She escorts them to the where the body is contained.

Upon entering the funeral home they find the funeral conductor embalming his body while listening to Black Sabbath. In a nod to one of the classic Zombie flicks of all time, Phantasm, we see Louis the chef handling a shiny metal ball.  Once again! They get captured, This time by what appears to be some paramilitary group. It seems they are going to conduct experiments to try and determine what the Cambodians were doing.  It appears that the Dr. is trying to achieve eternal life. (Without the nasty side effects of course). Helen becomes food for the final soldier of the original group.

It appears that their is a new body to examine and they leave Quinn locked up with the chef and bartender. obviously they are trying to force feed him the innocent barmaid as they are chained together while he is having a feeding frenzy moment.

The chef meanwhile leads through an abandoned military base. It appears the base has been overrun by Zombies. But the scientific "team" is still on the hunt for patient zero. Ly Quinn and the barmain make it out and while hunting down Zombies start discuss the pros and cons of Romero's DOTD and Snyder's DOTD.

Chef becomes a happy meal for some random zombies. Crappy tilted camera perspectives and dark scenes with poor visibility although obviously mean to instill a sense of dread in the viewer actually detracts and diminishes from the film.

The science crew finds the Zombie they are looking for and try to slice him up to find the scorpion within. Sounds like the title of a movie. " the scorpion within". Anyways, The good doctor and his crew  are dragged off and munched one. This leaves Lt. Quinn and the barmaid to clean up the remainder of the base. they miraculously find Jensen the chef. As they make a break for the exit they run into the ammo dump. Their genuis plan is to blow the base after rounding up the zombies. Obviously a knee to the batteries still hurts the male Zombies. Realistically though I can appreciate that. I have become quite attached to mine over the years and would probably retain some level of security for the boys once dead.

With time ticking out they all get into the jeep and the entire base goes BOOM containing the virus on that end. But what of Lt. Quinn. AHHHHHHH That is the question that I will leave for the viewer to see. Needless to say  Cheddar!

Although the movie didn't rely on gore they tried to play up the black/greenish blood thing to much and the cheezy effects just didnt scream out C rating. The acting, although not bad wasnt quite the caliber of lets say, Shaun of the Dead. The constant getting capturedm escaping, getting captured again got old fast. If you like broken records hey check this one out. If not, STAY AWAY!

I give this movie 2 and 1/2 severed thumbs, and remember,
I watch this shit so you don't have to!

John Billingsley... Langdon
Dean Cain... Lt. Bobby Quinn
Colleen Camp... Mrs. Wisteria
Greg Collins... Captain Niles
Ellie Cornell... Dr. Adams
Affion Crockett... Private Connery
Esteban Cueto... Sgt. Cruz
Peter Greene... Dr. Scott
Dean Haglund... Funeral Home Director
Brent Huff... Officer Raimi
Jamie Kaler... Private Lazenby
Steven Kriozere... Officer Campbell (as Steve Kriozere)
Natassia Malthe... Dr. Boyce
Mark McGraw... MP
Ho-Sung Pak... Superstar Merc
Steven Schub... Matheson
Armin Shimerman... Coroner Flutie
Alex Sol... Bartender
Guy Torry... Judson
Tyson Turrou... Pvt. Sanderson
Susan Ward... Holly
Kirk B.R. Woller... Major Bascom
Mark A. Altman... Doctor Altman (as Mark Altman)
Roxanne Arvizu... Corpse
Jackson Bolt... Reed
Ray Cannella... Jersey Zombie
Richard Dyer... Bouncer
Erin Howie... Liberty
Patrick Lee... Dying Zombie
Jill Montgomery... Lieutenant
Chuck Speed... Soldier
Mark Kriozere... Who Zombie
Robert Leos... Taxi Driver

Saturday, May 21, 2011

32 rules of Zombieland

 Although I'm not a big fan of the movie, here are some tips that might help you to survive a littlke longer in the event of a Zombie apocalypse.  I would like to thank Dave for this one!

Click HERE

Shane

Got Brains!

Greetings all!,

Just a cross stitch that my wife Jennifer made as a side project. 
I give this 5 severed thumbs.
Shane

Shaun of the Dead 2004

 "You got red on you."


Today's Flick is the classic Shaun of the Dead. Starring Simon Pegg, Nick Frost and Kate Ashfield. This spinoff of NOTLD is a laugh out loud riot of a film. Written by Edgar White this movie is given 5 stars on Netflix and 8 stars on IMDB. You can view the trailer(s) HERE

We start of with Shaun, Liz, and their friends at the Winchester Pub. It seems Shaun and Liz are stuck in a rut in their relationship and are trying to find a way out. Shaun of the Dead has plenty of nods to hstorical horror movies. For example, When Shaun gets to work we are informed that Ash is out sick. This is a reference to the Evil Dead. Shaun's step-father shows up and asks Shaun if he plans to attend his bi-monthly visit with his mom. Shaun's step-father is played by the great Bill Nighy. 

Ed Lives with Shaun but basically just sits around the house smoking and making a mess. In Shaun of the Dead we are treated to plenty of cameos by the cast of Spaced.  Such as the roommate Pete, and the character of Yvonne. The place Shaun works is Foree Electronics. A nod to Ken Foree of Dawn of the Dead.

Shaun messes up his date with Liz and winds up at the Winchester Pub with Ed , depressed and heartbroken. It is hear that we see for the first time that something isn't quite right. As Shaun wakes up hung over, he is treated to two undead in his garden (backyard). After laying waste to the two undead in the garden they develop a plan to try and rescue Liz and his mom. As the plan unfolds Phillip gets bitten and is now infected. 

Phillip Dies enroute to the Winchester the group is forced to travel by foot to the pub. They are attacked on the way. Getting out of this situation, they make it to the Winchester to realize that the streets are crawling with Zombies and they must get through. This is where Di's acting experience comes in handy.  They pretend to be Zombies and make it to the pub only to realize the pub is locked.

As Shaun tries to explain that their is a backdoor, Dave smashes a window to get in. Shaun realizes that the zombies will only be attracted to the open window and runs off to get the horde distaracted so the rest can make it inside. 

As the rest of the cast sits in the dark contemplating their fate they start to fight amongst themselves.  Shaun reappears having given the undead the slip. Uh-oh this didnt work. As they continue to fall apart Shaun's mom starts to feel ill. It is only now that we realize she has been bitten in the attack in the back yard. As she dies, Shaun cannot bring himself to do what is needed for everyone's benefit. This encures a Mexican standoff in which Liz seems to be the only one keeping it together. 

Eventually the Zombies break in grabbing Dave, and in the obligatory evisceration scene. This causes Di to run out into the Zombie horde in a vain attempt to get her boyfriends body parts back. (WTF) HE IS IN PIECES! 

This leaves only ED, Shaun, and Liz. As the zombies continue to overrun the pub Ed gets munched on. Liz and Shaun jump behind the bar and set it on fire in hopes that this will keep them safe for a minute. Ed eventually joins them and points out the storage basement. They eventually make it to the basement and lock themselves in.

it becomes obvious their is no real hope, Ed is bleeding out and dying and the Zombies are continuing to pour in and will eventually breakthrough the basement. As Liz and Shaun decide to commit suicide they light one last smoke. It is by lighting this smoke that they notice the lift controls which will take them to the streets. 

As they leave Ed with the rifle, they start their ascent into the zombie overrun streets. Just as they begin their assault to make a run for it. the military shows up and starts to dismember the Zombies with unneeded weapons fire. It seems Yvonne made it safely while all of Shaun's crew becomes zombie food. 

We jump a few weeks/months later, to Liz and Shaun sitting peacefully in their homes. It appears as though this Zombie outbreak was contained and eventually eradicated. As Liz fixes them a cup of coffee, Shaun takes a stroll out to the shed where we find a zombified Ed restrained and playing a video game. 

This movie is filled with moments of hilarity and sometimes serious scenes. It's hard to say a lot on this film without giving away some of the best moments. 

I would definately Give this 5 severed thumbs. (A rarity in Zombie films) 
And remember,
I watch this shit so you don't have to!
Shane

Simon Pegg... Shaun
Kate Ashfield... Liz
Nick Frost... Ed
Lucy Davis... Dianne
Dylan Moran... David
Nicola Cunningham... Mary
Keir Mills... Clubber 1 (as Kier Mills)
Matt Jaynes... Clubber 2
Gavin Ferguson... Football Kid
Peter Serafinowicz... Pete
Horton Jupiter... Homeless Man
Tim Baggaley... The Usher
Arvind Doshi... Nelson
Rafe Spall... Noel
Sonnell Dadral... Danny (as Sonell Dadral)
Samantha Day... Woman on Trisha
Trisha Goddard... Herself
David Park... Grave Scientist
Finola Geraghty... Distraught Vox Pop
Bill Nighy... Philip
Robert Fitch... Distressed Man
Sharon Gavin... Florist
Patch Connolly... Pigeon Man
Jessica Hynes... Yvonne (as Jessica Stevenson)
Stuart Powell... Snakehips
Patricia Franklin... Spinster
Steve Emerson... John
Phyllis MacMahon... Bernie (as Phyllis McMahon)
Krishnan Guru-Murthy... Himself
Carol Barnes... Herself
Rob Butler... Himself
Jeremy Thompson... Himself
Vernon Kay... Himself
Mark Donovan... Hulking Zombie
Christopher Harwood... Grizzled Zombie
Penelope Wilton... Barbara
Martin Freeman... Declan
Reece Shearsmith... Mark
Tamsin Greig... Maggie
Julia Deakin... Yvonne's Mum
Matt Lucas... Cousin Tom
Nick Ewans... Pyjama Zombie
Alex Lutes... Trisha Zombie
Chris Martin... Himself
Jon Buckland... Himself (as Jonny Buckland)
Keith Chegwin... Himself